A lot can change in a year

Exactly one year ago from this very moment I was in Charlotte, North Carolina at my CBYX interview. Now, just a mere 365 days later, I am living in Berlin, Germany and have an entirely different life. It's crazy how much has happened in that time and how much I have changed. It's really weird looking back on how naive and hopeful I was a year ago about the promised wonderful experiences that awaited me in Germany if I was accepted into the program. I, like all other hopeful exchange students, believed exchange to be rainbows and butterflies and smiles all the time. Yes, I had been told it's not all like that and that there will be bad days and homesickness and moments of feeling completely helpless, but in my haze of bright sunshiny expectations I couldn't fully comprehend the truth of those warnings. Now, after living six months in a country and culture that is not my own, with out my family but with multiple other families, a different language, and no friends, I can truly understand these warnings and how incredibly naive I was as I was sitting in my interview 365 days ago. Exchange is the most life changing thing you will ever experience and it is so difficult to put an experience like it into words. Yes, there are the sunshiny, happy days where everything seems perfect and you feel like you're on top of the world and can't even fathom the thought of going home. But then there are those days where you wonder why on earth you ever did this to yourself and you feel like the world is just crashing down around you and you are ready to just pack up your things and get on the next flight back to the good ol' US of A. Other times, you feel neither. You just go through the motions day to day and then are shocked when another week has already flown by. There are so many different emotions that go into an experience like this and they are incredibly hard to deal with sometimes, especially at 16. This is what has shaped me into who I am today. I have dealt with so many different experiences, good, bad, and ugly, that I never would have had in America. I have learned how to deal with all different types of people and how to handle myself in times of conflict. I have learned that it's okay to make mistakes and that you just need to laugh about it and move on. I have learned what it's like to be truly alone and how to accept and embrace it. I have learned how to take care of myself and what it's like to be a grown up. These are all lessons that have truly shaped me into the person I am today and I can't imagine what my life would be like or the type of person I would be if I had never experienced these things. As stated in the title, a lot can change in a year, and it is amazing to look back on the naive little girl nervously anticipating her acceptance into this program a year ago and comparing her to the person I am today.

Tschüss,
Dani♡

Fourth Time's the Charm!

So, I have once again changed host families. Yes, you read that correctly, I am now with my fourth host family. I'm not going to go into detail about why I switched but it just didn't really work out personality wise and there were a lot of miscommunications. However, this was a very stressful switch because my host family was only giving me until the end of the month to stay with them, so I only had two weeks to find a new host family. I really, really wanted to stay in Berlin because I absolutely adore this city and I didn't want to have to change schools again. So, in my panic I posted in pretty much every exchange student facebook page that I could find asking if anyone knew of anyone in Berlin who would be willing to host for the rest of the year. Luckily, a woman who is from Texas and is a local coordinator for an exchange organization saw my post and told me that she hosted a girl from Berlin last year and she would see if they were interested. She got me in touch with Marissa, my now host sister, and it turns out that the oldest daughter is doing a work and travel program in Australia this year so they had an open room. Also, they have hosted before and know what it is like. So, the next day I went over and meet with Marissa and her mom to meet them and see if living with them would be a possibility. Luckily, we clicked right away and they offered to host me for the rest of the year! So, at the end of January, I packed up my things and headed to my new host family. I now live in an area of Berlin called Charlottenburg. It is a little far from my school but I make it work and it's not actually too bad of a commute. Also, I love my new host family so much! I've been here almost two weeks and we get along really well! Best of all, they have a dog! Her name is Bonnie and she's so sweet! I have never not had a pet before so being without a dog or a cat these past five months has been really weird and difficult, so having Bonnie now is so great! Also, we only speak German together. It was hard the first couple of days to make the transition into all German but it's gotten a lot easier these past few days and I'm amazed at how much I have improved in just these couple of weeks. On top of all this, the first week of February was winter break for Berlin so I had a week off of school. It was really nice to have that time to settle in to my new host family. Also, I spent a lot of the week exploring different parts of Berlin. My favorite area would definitely have to be Kreuzberg. It is a very hipster/artsy area and a lot of students and artists live there. During my exploration of Kreuzberg I came upon a market hall called Markthalle Neun. The day I was in Kreuzberg (Thursday) was the day that there is a street food market in this hall. I decided to go and I was definitely not dissapointed. It was such a cool place! Instead of your typical greasy, fried street food it was very classy and gourmet. I had such a great time walking around and seeing all the different stands (it was very international) and on top of that the food was amazing! This market is every Thursday so I'll definitely have to go back sometime! Also, over this break, my friend from my program, Kevin, and his mom who was here visiting him were in Berlin. I got together with them on Friday and it was such a great day! First we went to the Berlin Zoo and it was actually quite impressive. For not a huge land area there were a lot of exhibits and we actually spent most of the day there walking around and seeing everything. Since the zoo is so central, after we were finished there we went to Kurfürstendamm (a.k.a Ku'damm), one of the largest and most well known shopping streets in Berlin, and went to the Hard Rock Café for dinner. After dinner, Kevin's mom wanted to buy a pair of German boots so we went shoe shopping! It was so fun to do stuff like this again since I don't really have anyone to go shopping with or do those types of things with here. After shopping Kevin's mom went back to the hotel because she was flying back to the US the next morning and needed to get ready, so Kevin and I went to a bar for a little while and hung out together. It was such a great day and I am so glad that I got to see the two of them! On Sunday, I went to Potsdam, a city right outside of Berlin, with my host mom and her best friend. We had such a great day walking around and seeing all the gourgeous castles and buildings. I never realized how beautiful Potsdam is and I'll definitely have to go back sometime and explore more of downtown since we spent most of our time in the huge park with all of the castles. All in all, these last couple of weeks have been really great and now that I'm finally in such a great host family who really opened up their hearts to me and have taken me in and given me so much love I am finally starting to have the exchange experience that you're supposed to.

Tschüss,
Dani♡

Artwork and graffiti in Kreuzberg, most of the store 

fronts are painted like this!

Inside Markthalle Neue! 

A polar bear at the Berlin Zoo

Neues Palais von Sanssouci, in Potsdam

Schloß Sanssouci, in Potsdam

Mid Year Orientation in Ahrweiler!

This past weekend (Thursday Jan. 23 - Sunday Jan. 26) was probably one of the best weekends of my exchange year so far. The remaining 48 out of the original 50 CIEE CBYXer's all traveled from our host families in various parts of Germany and met in a youth hostel in Ahrweiler, a town about 30 minutes outside of Bonn. It was so great to see everyone again and it's hard to believe that it's been over five months since we all said goodbye at the end of language camp. Everyone has grown and changed so much and become considerably more German, so much for some people that it was hard to recognize them at first. I don't know if I'm really supposed to talk about what happened at mid year so it isn't ruined for future CBYXer's who may be reading my blog so I'll just give a basic outline. A lot of our time was spent in meetings with the entire group and meetings with our small groups from language camp. We talked a lot about all the experiences we have have had the first half of the year, the good, the bad, and the ugly. It was really good to hear about everyones experiences and how they compare to my own. On Friday, we took the train to Bonn and toured the Haus der Geschichte (history museum). After the museum, we were given the rest of the afternoon to have free time in Bonn. Katy, Aaron, Ashley, and I had such a great evening. We found a British/American food store and it's safe to say we got a little too excited. After loading up on American products, we went to this adorable Irish Pub for dinner. It was probably one of the coolest restaurants I've ever been too and I wish I had a picture of the entire inside. Basically, it looked like this old library on the inside and it had all these little alcoves with tables. It's hard to explain but it was super cool. Anyways, after a great meal and lots of yummy apple beer at the pub, we went down to the Rhine river. After spending a little while at the Rhine, we headed back to the train station to go back to the hostel. Like us, most people decided to take the last train. Our group were pretty much the only people in that section of the train so everyone was being so loud and crazy and it was such a fun ride. Saturday was out last full day together. In the afternoon, we walked into downtown Ahrweiler and it was such a cute town! It was super old and very typical German. That night all 48 of us plus the five teamers and Julia (the head of CBYX in the CIEE office) went to the bar in Ahrweiler and just had a great time. After going back to the hostel, everyone was running around and staying up so late and just really making the most of our last night together. Sunday, after sad goodbyes we all parted ways and headed back to our host families. Being in Berlin, I had about an 8 hour trip and didn't get back until around 9:30 at night. So all in all, mid year was an incredible weekend with incredible people and it was so nice to have a little "American" break.

Tschüss,
Dani♡

I love my Americans! <3

So much enthusiasm in the British/American store

The Irish Pub with Ashley, Katy, and Aaron! 

Ahrweiler 

Weihnachten und Silvester! (Christmas and New Year's)

The holiday season. It can either be one of the happiest times of the year or one of the most depressing. Usually it's one end of the spectrum or the other, but this year it was a mix of both for me. Obviously, going into my year abroad I knew that I would not be able to come home for the holidays but nothing can truly prepare you for being away from your family on Christmas. Even though it was an extremely hard time emotionally and probably the worst homesickness I have experience so far this year, in the end I think it was a very good thing to experience. By not being able to celebrate Christmas with my family it has given me so much more appreciation and love for the close bond my family shares. When you have the same traditions and ways of celebration year after year, you grow used to that pattern and have fond memories of the special ways your family does things. After 16 years of celebrating Christmas with the people who I cherish most in this world and with the same traditions I think back on with fond memories, suddenly having absolutely everything, even down to the day Christmas is celebrated on (it's on the 24th in Germany), be different is such a hard thing to accept that in a way it makes it not even seem like it's Christmas. At least that's how it felt for me. But however hard it may have been, it turned out to be a very good day! As I said earlier, Christmas here is celebrated on December, 24th instead of the 25th like in the US. Also, Christmas here seems to be much more laid back. In the morning it felt just like a regular day and my host siblings were all out visiting with their friends. In the afternoon, we went to church. I couldn't see much of what was going on because we arrived a little late and had to sit in the back row of the balcony but it was very interesting to experience church in Germany, especially since my family at home is not very religious so we do not go to church very often. After church, we went back to the house and had Christmas dinner. Unlike in the US where there is a big meal, here every family has their own traditional Christmas dinner that they have every year. My host family makes bouletten, which is kind of similar to meatballs, and potato salad. After dinner, we unwrapped presents. Unlike in the US where there is usually an over the top amount of presents, here there is a smaller amount of more personal presents. Everyone gives a present to the other members of the family. Also, there are no stockings. After presents, we all played board games and talked and just enjoyed the rest of the evening. I got to skype with my family and my grandparents who were in North Carolina for Christmas. It was really great to get to talk to them and have a little normality brought back to Christmas. The next day, the 25th, my host family and I headed out for Braunlage, a small town in the Herz mountains, where we stayed for four days. Because of this I was not able to talk to my family at all on the 25th, which was very difficult for me. We got back to Berlin on the 29th, and then on the 31st my best friend from my exchange group, Katy, came to Berlin to visit! That night, we went to the Silvester (New Year's) celebration at the Brandenburger Tor (Brandenburg Gate) with my friend Alessandro, an Italian exchange student at my school. This is one of the largest New Year's celebrations in all of Europe and it was absolutely amazing, definitely one of the best ways to ring in 2014! There was about 1 million people there and it was absolutely packed! Somehow, we ended up really close to the main stage and were in the front section which was so cool! We left the Brandenburger Tor around 12:15 and walked to Potsdamer Platz. And let me tell ya, downtown Berlin on Silvester was craziest, most fantastic thing I have ever seen. There were so many people that parts of Potsdamer Platz had to be sectioned off and people were setting off fireworks everywhere. It felt like walking through a war zone with all the smoke and noise. For the next two days after New Year's, Katy and I played tourist around Berlin. We saw all the big sights and even though I have been living here over a month, that was my first time seeing everything! We had such a great time and learned so much about Berlin! On Katy's last night here, Katy, Alessandro, and I went to the Hard Rock Café for dinner. It was so great to finally have authentic American food for the first time in five months. The next day, I said goodbye to Katy at the Hauptbhanhof (main train station). It was so sad to see her leave but luckily we'll see each other again in a few weeks at mid year orientation! All in all, this year was definitely the most interesting holiday season I have experienced so far. Instead of being at home, spending time with my family and doing hectic last minute Christmas shopping, I was over 4,000 miles away experiencing the way people in Germany celebrate. Christmas was hard but as my exchange organization says, "it's not good, not bad, just different", and New Year's was by far the most amazing New Year's of my life. So well it may not have been the typical holiday season, it is one that has taught me so much and one that I will definitely never forget.

Tschüss,
Dani♡

The Christmas tree

 The live coverage of Silvester at the Brandenburger Tor

 The Silvester party at the Brandenburger Tor. This is from when we first got

there, somehow we were able to make it to the very front.

Katy, Alessandro, and I at the Brandenburger Tor

 Katy and I at Checkpoint Charlie 

Thanksgiving and Moving to Berlin

First off, I would like to apologize for not having posted in so long! I have had so much going on this past month that I kept forgetting to write a post but I promise from now on I will be updating this blog at least once a week!

This year was definitely one of the most unique Thanksgivings I have experienced. Since it is (obviously) not a holiday that is celebrated in Germany, I had school on Thanksgiving day. Because of this I was not able to celebrate on the 28th, but my French teacher wanted to have a Thanksgiving party in class that day! First, I gave a presentation on America and the history and traditions of Thanksgiving. After that, we went down to the little cafeteria and ate the pumpkin and apple pies I had made for the class. It was really funny to see the German kids in my class try pie for the first time, since there is no such thing as pie in Germany. They kept calling it cake no matter how many times I told them it wasn't which was pretty funny. The next day, Friday, was my last day of school in Riesa. My class gave me a nice little note that they had all signed along with a picture of the class, which I thought was really sweet. I was cooking a big Thanksgiving meal for my host family the next day, so Friday afternoon I baked another pumpkin pie and apple pie and prepared the stuffing. Let me just tell you something about making an entire Thanksgiving dinner in Germany: it is much easier said than done. First off, I have never cooked Thanksgiving dinner before, I have helped but never done the entire thing on my own. Secondly, since Thanksgiving is not a German holiday it is nearly impossible to find some of the ingredients and tools that you need. Pie is not a thing here, so I was not able to find a pre-made pie crust or pumpkin puree. Because of this, pie making was about a three day process. I had to make homemade pumpkin puree, which I accidentally ended up making way too much because I used two pumpkins because I wasn't sure how much it would make. Also, I had to make homemade pie crust, which is apparently a very hard thing to get right on the first try but luckily mine turned out well. Since there is no such thing as a pie pan here I had to use a cake pan but luckily, it all worked out! I am actually very proud of how well my completely made from scratch pies turned out and they were definitely worth all the work because I got to share such an American tradition with German people and it was so great! The only bad thing about it though is that my mom and grandmother have now put me on official pie making duty for the following Thanksgivings because of how well they turned out! Ok, so I just realized how much I rambled about my pie making adventures and struggles, so I'm going to move on to the rest of Thanksgiving now...  On Saturday morning, I prepared the turkey and started cooking it. I had a few hours after that to pack and start to get ready for my move to Berlin the following day. Around 2, I started making all the side dishes. My host mom and I realized that we were going to have way too much food for the five of us (my host family, one of my host grandmothers, and I), so we invited Chacho (the other exchange student from Texas in Riesa) and his host family, who are the best friends of my host family, to come to dinner. Luckily they were able to make it and it was so great to be able to celebrate with them! Luckily, all of the food turned out great and I still can't believe I was able to pull it off, by myself, in a country where there is no Thanksgiving short cuts. The only thing that didn't go so well was my attempt at carving the turkey. Obviously, I had never done it before so it didn't look so pretty but that's ok because I managed to get all the meat off. In total, we had turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potatoes, squash (which no one knew what it was so that wasn't really eaten but that's ok), green beans, corn, rolls, and pumpkin and apple pies for dessert. So, all in all I think my first ever time cooking Thanksgiving was a success!

Sunday, the day after I celebrated Thanksgiving with my host family, I moved to my new host family in Berlin. It was very sad to say goodbye to the family that had taken me out of a bad situation and opened up their home to me. I am so grateful for everything they did for me and I will never be able to thank them enough. Luckily, the train ride wasn't that long, only about an hour and a half all together. First, I took the train from Riesa to Leipzig where I had to connect to Berlin. My local coordinator met me at the train station in Leipzig and it was really nice to be able to say goodbye to her. After about a 30 minute wait with Sandra, I boarded the train headed to Berlin. When I finally got to Berlin, I was greeted by my new host mom, my host brother, and one of my two host sisters. We went back to the house and had a nice lunch then after I went for a walk with my host sister Celina. That night, my entire host family, including my 16 year old host sister's boyfriend and my host mom's boyfriend, and I all went out to a pizza place for dinner. So far I absolutely adore Berlin and my host family is amazing! Later on, I'll write a post about Berlin and all the amazing things here! But I think I have written enough for now, so here are some pictures of my German Thanksgiving!

Tschüss,
Dani♡

My pumpkin and apple pies!

The turkey (pre carving attempt)

The table!

Everyday Life

Having now been in Germany a little over three months, things have begun to settle into everyday life. I'm over my "honeymoon phase" and have begun to accept that I'm going to be here for seven more months. Homesickness has been a very big obstacle in this stage of the year, but I've settled into a routine and everything is starting to feel normal again. Except for the fact that I can hardly understand anyone. Adjusting to the language has been much more difficult for me than I expected it to be. Everyday I pick up new words and phrases and I am starting to be able to understand people better but I am still having a lot of trouble speaking. German is such a complicated language and a lot of the time I feel like I will never get the hang of it, especially the grammar. I so desperately want to be able to speak and communicate with the people around me but it is just taking so much more time and effort than I ever imagined to get it would to get to that level. But I'm sure it will get better with time and practice. Anyways, I have two weeks left in Riesa before moving to my new host family in Berlin. There is so much going on in these last two weeks that I'm sure the time is going to fly by. On Wednesday, I'm going to Leipzig with my host family and we're meeting Kevin, a boy from my exchange group, and his host family there. Kevin and I have the same local cordinator who will also be there. I think we're all going ice skating together but I'm not sure. Anyways, it will be really fun. Then, next Thursday is Thanksgiving. On Thursday, my French teacher decided that we're having a little Thanksgiving party in class even though it has nothing to do with French. I'm really excited to share Thanksgiving with the kids in my class and I think I'm going to try and bring in a pumpkin pie and an apple pie for the class. Since Thanksgiving is not celebrated in Germany, we still have school that day, so I will not have time to cook a Thanksgiving dinner for that night. Instead, I'm going to cook a big Thanksgiving meal on Saturday for my host family and host grandparents. So far this proves to be easier said than done. Since Thanksgiving is not celebrated in Germany, it has been very difficult trying to find all the right ingredients needed for the traditional Thanksgiving meal, such as a large turkey, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie ingredients, etc. Hopefully, I will be able to find everything and make it as authentic as possible! The day after this big Thanksgiving celebration, I say goodbye to Riesa and my incredible host family here and head up to Berlin to start the next chapter of my exchange year! It will be very bittersweet to leave Riesa and the people here but I am so excited to go to Berlin and experience life in Germany's capital!

Tschüss,
Dani♡

Herbstferien

So for the past two weeks I have not had to go to school. Why you may ask? Because Germany is amazing and has a two week long fall break called Herbstferien. For the first week of break I didn't have much planned and mostly hung out at home. We were dog sitting for some friends who were on away on vacation and it was so great to have a dog in the house again, I miss mine a lot. I went on a day trip to a place called Festung Königstein with my host family. It is an old fort about 20 miles from the Chez Republic border and the view was absolutely breathtaking. The fort overlooked a river and a couple small towns as well as the mountains. All that combined with the fall colors made for a gorgeous view. On Monday, I took a train to Dresden by myself for the day and went shopping and walked around the city. It was really fun to explore the city on my own. I love public transportation in Germany because it makes it so easy to do things like go to Dresden for the day! A few days later I drove all the way across Germany with my host dad to visit friends in Wiesbaden, a city outside of Frankfurt. We spent a night with them in Wiesbaden and then walked around Frankfurt the next day before driving back to Riesa. That night we went to a party at a the house of the friends we had dog sat for. It was really fun to see all of them and get to know them better! On Tuesday of the second week of break, my host family and I went on a trip to Hamburg. It is an absolutely gorgeous city! The first night we were there, we were walking around a mall because it was rainy outside. We go into this little shop where they sell tickets to all the events in Hamburg. Long story short, we somehow managed to get 4 tickets to the sold out Bruno Mars concert that was starting in an hour. We hopped on the train to get to the arena and got there about 20 minutes before the show started! Sadly, I wasn't allowed to bring in my camera so I don't really have any good pictures of the show but it was absolutley amazing nonetheless! The next day, we walked around the harbor and downtown Hamburg some more. On Thursday, we left Hamburg and drove to Rostock, a city on the Baltic Sea. First we went to a beach town called Warnemünde and walked around for awhile. Then, we went to the friend's house where we stayed for the night in Rostock. The next day, we went into downtown Rostock and walked around for awhile. We then started the long drive back down to Riesa. All in all, Herbstferien was amazing! I got to see so many places in Germany and I had a great time spending time with my host family, I'll miss them!

Tschüss,
Dani♡

The view from Festung Königstein

Wiesbaden

Frankfurt

Hamburg

Warnemünde

Rostock